How long have you and your dog been quarantined? He’s starting to look like a sammitch to you? Where’s the other slice?

You can make a Pinata!

Fat Cats are why the shelves are empty.

During the Quarantine, you can teach your Dog to speak French.

The grimace is because he's being taught French.

German with a French accent?

Be careful there, don’t advertise, your front yard will become a holy shrine and all those german speaking french peasants will pilgrimage to your house to get themselves healed. Your cat will become famous though.

Yesterday, I scored two 6-packs of "Angle Soft" toilet tissue.

My son and I had stopped at his local 'Publix' grocery-store in Florida, for some fruit, vegetables, and bakery bread.
My son headed Right with a cart. I headed Left, bare-handed.

My Hunting Intuition told me to go to the 'paper-products' aisle. As I got there and looked at a lot of empty shelving, I caught movement in the corner of my eye.

A huge store clerk came gliding down Aisle 10 with a cardboard box perched on his shoulder. I stood motionless as he cut open the box. Eureka, it was TP!

I 'pulled the trigger' and calmly asked for "two packages for two customers". He willingly handed them to me from the box.

My son had come up behind me with his shopping cart.
I casually slipped 'our treasure' into the cart and we quietly exited the aisle, so as not to stampede the herd.

Feeling Lucky and liking the look of the Tomatoes, my son had got over in 'Vegetables', I went to the 'Meat' aisle and found a package of good bacon, for BLT sandwiches for a family pool-side lunch.

I am quite a Hero in my Daughter-in Law's eyes. Earlier in the day, I had fixed their Master-Bedroom toilet, that was mysteriously running at night and keeping her awake.

.... and now I brought home the Bacon and TP!

Sad, the things that become victories and coups these days, but, It's reassuring to be on good terms and valued by the people, who carry on the family name and will make important decisions, when you are near the end.